


Postscript

by fairy_tale_echo



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst and Humor, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, Epistolary, M/M, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Protective Steve Rogers, Steve Tries To Explain Himself, Steve Writes Letters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-08
Updated: 2016-05-08
Packaged: 2018-06-07 02:40:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6782074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fairy_tale_echo/pseuds/fairy_tale_echo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>postscript: an additional remark at the end of a letter, after the signature and introduced by “P.S.”</i>
</p><p> </p><p>13 postscripts Steve could have written on the back of his letter to Tony.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Postscript

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Постскриптум](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7397257) by [beatlomanka](https://archiveofourown.org/users/beatlomanka/pseuds/beatlomanka)



> Obviously: major spoilers for _Civil War_.
> 
> What can I say? I figured Steve worked pretty hard on that letter, so he'd take his time and make sure he said EVERYTHING. So here's 13 things Tony _could_ have found written on the back. Little bit of humor, little bit of angst, little bit of history, Bucky/Steve devotion down to the core: all my favorite Cap things!

P.S. –

Pepper Potts is your family too, Tony – not just the team. Don’t be a dummy.  I know it’s hard.  I know how it feels to want to push someone away because you’re afraid they know you too well to love you … but give Pepper a chance to show she knows you well enough to love you.  She has fire under her skin, Tony – just like you.  Don’t turn your back on that.  Make it work.  Figure things out, that’s what you do best.

\---

P.S. –

Can you make sure that Sam’s mom and nephews and Clint and Scott’s kids are taken care of – money, I mean and any kind of slick Stark protection you have – so they can at least feel better about that when I get them?

And speaking of kids: keep an eye on that kid from Queens, I think we could use him. He’s got something that could be … amazing.

\---

P.S. –

We’re safe.  All of us, I wanted you to know that. Even Bucky.  He’s not out there unchecked, Tony. He’s safe and not active and I know – I looked into his eyes and saw Bucky Barnes again. I know that doesn’t feel like much to you, but it means everything to me.  If you’re worried about us missing any pieces, trust we have found each other and if we haven’t – I won’t rest until we do.  We’re all safe as you could be in this situation and we’re going to stay ready.

Well, maybe I’ll grow a beard.

\---

P.S. -

You probably won't believe this but you and Bucky remind me of each other.  Always have, since I first met you and saw the way you set your chin against the world.  I can't speak for him, I wouldn't presume to try, and I  **know** that he will someday work on settling all the red in his ledger.  But I do want to say - he would never,  _Bucky_ would never do those things.  That is **not** James Buchanan Barnes.  I am not making excuses, I am not trying to dodge responsibility: I am asking you to accept a good man was tortured, for years, into doing very bad things. It doesn't make it go away, it doesn't make it right.  But that wasn't Bucky Barnes.  Someday, I believe this truly, someday you'll know the real Bucky Barnes and...that will be a good day indeed.

\---

P.S. –

Maybe to you, Hydra is an old whispered story from your old man, comic book villains twisting their mustaches. But it’s not like for me or Bucky - they’re as real as anything, as real as yesterday to us. So, when I saw the highest levels of our government, the people I’d sworn to fight alongside, stand up for Hydra … Tony, I want to trust the government, I want to believe this is for the best.  But it ain’t that easy.  They - they tortured him for years. They made him do things…you saw.  And they did it under friendly faces.  Keep your eyes open, Tony. 

\---

P.S. –

I had no idea Lang’s suit could do that, I swear.  It was fantastic though, wasn’t it?  We have to show Thor that sometime, can you imagine how he'll react?!

\---

P.S. –

I guess I don’t know a lot about fathers.  Howard…Howard was a good person, Tony.  Sometimes you remind me so much of him, the way he thought ten steps ahead, the way he said the things no one else in the room would say, I see him in you.  I am not sure I ever told you that?  He would be proud of who you are, Tony, because he was the same kind of man. That means something. I **don’t** know a lot about fathers, but I know about mothers.  I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry.

\---

P.S. –

You ~~were~~ are my friend. I couldn’t tell you everything Bucky ~~was~~ is to me but “he’s my friend” is slightly misleading.  It’s not…enough. In the roar of that moment, I couldn’t explain it right, maybe I never can.  But it’s not about – I don’t want it to be about sides. I can never thank you enough for the team and the trust. That’s why the phone is in here. You are my friend.

\---

P.S. –

You know I was going to die, right? Not … not in an abstract way.  I couldn’t breathe.  Every winter I got weaker.  You’ve seen pictures of me, I’m sure. I found out nowdays they say I was “sickly” – but my whole life, it was more than that. And Bucky, he wasn’t just my friend.  He saved me, Tony.  He didn’t just stick by me in fights I shouldn’t have started: he worked so we’d have money to buy medicine when I was sick, he helped pay rent, he reminded me I had a family when I felt alone. He kept me going. I couldn’t turn my back on him, never.  No matter what. It wasn’t about you, wasn’t about the team, wasn’t even about the Accords.  It never will be. It’s him, it is always him, above all else.

\---

P.S. –

Do you know why they called him the Winter Solider, Tony?  Find out.  PAY ATTENTION. Be safe.

\---

P.S. –

I left the shield for a lot of reasons, some of which I can’t even really explain to myself.  But it’s not much different than you throwing away the arc reactor - leaving the shield doesn’t change who I am.  Keep it safe for me, OK?  Howard did make it, but **I** picked out the colors.

\---

P.S. –

At first, I wanted to say: what would you do if it was Rhodey?

But that’s not it.  Then maybe: what would you do if it was Pepper?

Didn’t you rip the world apart for Pepper Potts?  What if you couldn’t have gotten Extremis under control?  Would it matter if she was a weapon that might go off? Would she still be Pepper? Would you love her, need her, any less? Would you hold her responsible for something a madman did to her? Would she be Pepper, still and always, who loved you through everything?  Even if Extremis was still inside her? Would you stop trying to cure her? Would you turn your back on her? 

He’s not my Rhodey, he’s not even really my Pepper.  He’s my _Bucky_. 

\---

P.S. –

I love him, Tony. Not like a brother, not like a friend. Like drop the shield, jump off buildings, fight the whole world, give up everything for the chance for him to be back with me. **That** kind of love.  Get it now? 

I fucking love him. Isn’t that explanation enough?  
  
P.P.S. –

Excuse the language.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my very first ever MCU fic, dashed out with no beta in a fit of FEELINGS right after _Civil War_. I appreciate any thoughts/comments/kudos/reblogs/suggestions!


End file.
